towards a better change.

Salam Maal Hijrah 1433 to all readers.

how's the 1432 treats you? how's your life back then? despite we are using and applying the English calendars, still we aren't forgetting our Islamic one.. rite? 1434 years of hijri has begun and this is the time we checked and analyzed ourselves for what we had done before. and some of them has updated bout their "azam tahun baru" for a change.. maybe.. 

my life is just an ordinary one. went for umrah last 4 month didn't change me after all. i'm not becoming what i wanted to be. instead.. it became worst. im quite a sinful muslim. i realized it but still.. i did the same thing over and over again. i cared about my relationship with humans but not with The Immortal One. once you stepped your foot onto doing bad things... it's hard to turn you back without the eagerness of repent. shame on me. as a student who always kept inside the dalil and hadis in mind, i seldom applied it. =(

as for today.. i woke up earlier and went for study circle class..(earlier for the 1st time =.=") i learnt a lot today when we recited surah al-mu'minun and rephrase its meaning one by one. as the surah told us about the characteristic of mu'min people.. i realized that i had not becoming one of them.. when i started reciting and memorizing one of the prayers, my heart ached deeply. too much sins i had committed. i had being the slave of my own desire quite good enough. i had defaulted my own self. im a total failure of becoming a good muslim and a role to my own siblings. =(

اللهم اغفرلي ما قدمت وما أخرت وما أسررت وما أعلنت وما أسرفت و ما أنت أعلم به مني، أنت المقدم و أنت المؤخر لا إله إلا أنت   

Ya Allah, forgive me for what I have done and what I might do, and all that You know better than i realized it. You are the pioneer and last in all affairs what is veiled, known and violated the limit.

Allah has gave us many chances to repent. and still.. we are lack of awareness that "malaikat maut" are always watching us 70 times. be thankful that we are still alive today and have the time to revert ourselves and muhasabah diri. if we (you and me) are still at the old track, let's do a lil bit transformation towards a better change.. a better muslim..

 رب ادخلني مدخل صدق و أخرجني مخرج صدق و اجعل لي من لدنك ساطاناٌ نصيراً

 Ya Allah, masukkan aku ke tempat yg benar dan keluarkanlah aku ke tempat yg benar. Berikanlah aku kekuasaan yg mendapat pertolongan drpd-Mu..

 my prayers are..

1) take a good care of my relations with god!.. 

2) patient.. banyakkan bersabar.. life and relations are both challenging. bear in mind that i cant fulfill everyone's satisfaction.

3) keep my own thoughts to myself..(exceptions for opinions expression)

4) more towards down-to-earth attitude.

 5) and of course.. x membazir.. =.="

 so guys.. please dont wait anymore.. let's transform ourselves towards a better person. do it for yourselves. it does not mean that you would have to change who you really are but this is about a change for a better. life is short. live simply just to make others simply live. salam.

 oh btw... 

this is bullshit.

p.s: nk dekat final nie lah br nk berubah. ye dok??